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9/17/13 10:14 pm

I know i'm not an overly religious person. If there is a God, I know what he doesn't want me to do. I just don't know what is I am supposed to be doing.

3/15/12 08:50 pm

Living with David again. Is this harder than I remember? I don't know.
He is very depressed, just about to the point of not being about to get out of bed in the morning. Losing a job will do that to you.
I feel like it is my job to try and fix him, whatever is wrong. But I can't or I don't know how. With work being an average of 50 to 60 hours a week, that certainly isn't helping matters any.
I am better at hitting the gym though, as there is one just upstais. The fact that he isn't as interested in me/sex helps the motivation. How is it that the man I love doesn't want me all the time, when I know a few that do?

1/1/12 05:34 pm

He can only tell me he loves me when he is drunk. And even then doesn't remember texting me.

11/11/11 09:28 pm

Operation “don’t buy food so you don’t have anything to eat” is just about working. 5 lbs down, 55 more to go. Though at this rate it will take me over a year. *sigh* and the holidays coming up will be difficult.

Dave loses his job at the end of year. Even the thought of coming to live with me doesn’t ease he depression. Not quite sure why I’m trying anymore

7/14/11 01:45 pm

I am smart enough to know that I can't change him.
I need to be strong enough to understand that.

7/7/11 03:24 pm

BJH didn’t want me. They don’t know what they are missing!!

What happens when you can not talk to your spouse or closest love one?
You either close up, or find someone to talk to. I’m not sure which is worse.

6/20/11 08:46 pm - BJH and WashU

I have an interview for a real kickass job on wednesday, I fly out tomorrow.
I am so worried I'm going to screw it up somehow. I can barely sleep.

6/15/11 07:29 pm

I haven't had a pay check since May 6th, my paperwork has been lost somewhere Sue was kind enough not to cash my rent check, as I was hopoing to get out soon. At this rate I'm going to be homeless again.

4/23/11 09:33 pm - 27th Orbit

So I didn't get to have birthday dinner and sex with a cute guy with an accent, but I did get dinner with a friend.
Hell, the only guy with an accent that I talked to was my boss.

My life is so sad.

4/8/11 09:26 am

So, after a bit of a heart to heart (least as much as I could do as tired as I was and the fact we were 400 miles away from each other) it has been decided that as soon as I get a job, Dave is quitting his to come and live with me, no matter where it is, the only provision being that the Mars company hasn't called and wanted him yet.

So that is a good thing. Dave knows enough people and has enough hard and software to keep doing research for a while, even if he isn't getting paid. Though I am hoping that he could at least find a community college for which he could teach a class or two.

So now I get the stress of knowing that it is my inability to find a job that is keeping my husband unhappy in his job and the two of us apart.
No pressure.
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